My day at Arcade!

Boy, it’s been a while since I’ve written about my Camino. It’s been over a year since I went and have still so much to write and share what the “post-camino” has brought to my life and is still bringing, but I can’t tell you the “post-camino” until I finish sharing my actual Camino. So here is another part.


At the albergue I was given my “bunk”, no other pilgrims were there yet.  I was the first one to check in so I pretty much had my choice of bunks.  I settled in and I could hear other pilgrims checking in so I proceeded to gather my things to go and take a much deserved shower. Well, I wasn’t the only one that was gathering their things for a shower, by the time I got to the showers there were 2 other ladies in there, this would turn out to be the one of the hardest things I would have to do, you see I have been body shamed for years.  After I had my children I was constantly told how horrible I looked, how fat I was, asking me how I could I expect anyone to love me with my “million and one stretch marks”. Even though I had made a choice to put myself under the knife years ago to “take care” of that problem, that didn’t matter.  So, trying to just hop in an open shower was totally out of my comfort zone.  Well, I left my sports underwear on, yupp that’s what I did.  I could not get myself to take them off, I was so uncomfortable, I bathed as best as I could and was so clumsy in trying to cover myself as I was getting the soap etc.  It was the worse shower ever.  I was so glad to get out of there! These are some of the things you don’t realize you enjoy on a regular basis, the pure fact that you have your own private shower, you come out and you can put on a robe and walk around you place without a thought of who is watching, if anyone is.  I am sure the ladies that were in there didn’t mind me at all, they were doing their business like no one else was there.  I wished at that moment that I could be like them, that I just did what I needed to do without thinking of who is around me.  Well I survived my NON-PRIVATE shower. The worst was over.


I got dressed, went back into the bathroom to wash my clothes and walked to the back of the building to hang them to dry.  There were other people there but I didn’t talk to anyone, they all seemed to have “partners” or a group that were together, they didn’t pay me no mind.  The bunks had a drawer that you could lock up, so I put all my stuff in there, locked it and walked out.  I wanted to go to the beach, I could see the beach from the albergue so I decided to walk a little, it didn’t look too far, but the more I walked in pain, the more I saw that it wasn’t as close as I thought, I came up to a bridge and I just decided to turn around and head back to the albergue. 


As I walked back I stopped in a grocery store to get some things, I needed to have something to eat and some coffee in the mornings to get my energy for walking, I bought some goodies and an apple.  I was worried about the weight I would add to my load with taking snacks with me but my gut told me I need to take some along the way.  This is where I found my delicious lemon cookies, those would be my savior snacks.  I know was on a mission to find somewhere to eat, most places looked like seafood places, and I’m so picky that it was a hard choice. Not to mention it had already been days since I had taken my BP medicine so my whole body was swollen, I had to eat even though I knew anything containing salt would only make it worse.  I know I know, it was dangerous but one of pills is a diuretic and I didn’t want to have to go in the middle of the woods.  I finally came to a stop, you could sit outside and eat, there were a couple of people around, but as the other days, I ended up alone.  I ordered way too much food and I had my first glass of wine, day was ending on a high note. Nope, didn’t have the “pulpo” wasn’t doing it.

By the time I made it back there a LOT more pilgrims at the albergue, I now had bunk buddies, my bunk buddie would be an older gentleman, I was like, “how is this man getting up there” but he sure did without any problems, haha.  He introduced himself and apologized in advance if he made too much noise.  I felt so weird sleeping with so many people around me but I slept good, couldn’t complain. Either I was super tired, or no one snored throughout the night.  

5am yupp people were up, lights were being turned on and all I could do was feel the pain on my feet and my legs.  I finally got up and gathered my belongings, a couple from Canada made some small talk, the lady asked me if  I was questioning why we do that to ourselves, and I responded with a smile, yes ma’am, from the moment I walked my first steps.  

Oops, I forgot the best part of my stay.  Because I wanted to “fuel” my body for the walk, I put my pack together and went to the kitchen to prepare myself some coffee before I left.  For those who know me, I am an introvert in so many things, this would be one of them…I went searching for sugar, creamer, would not ask anyone, not that there were any available bodies that were in the mood to talk to me anyway, well that’s the way I saw and felt it.  I felt like I was invading someone’s kitchen, looking for a mug to heat up my water, finally got one, heated up my water, went to the area where they had the sugar, creamer, salt, etc.  I prepare my coffee, hey actually had some milk so I was good.  I take a sip of my yummy coffee and O M G, I spit it out…I didn’t read the label right, I put SALT in my coffee….YUCKKKKK!!! Found the SUGAR, made me another coffee and off I went.  Hahaha.



After walking UP for hours, I came to a point where I began to see the water.  As soon as I had a peek of that sight tears just began to roll down my face.  During my walk, I beat myself up so much, my mind kept rewinding all the negative words I had been told for years.  After pushing myself to keep going, that I wasn’t a quitter, I saw this sight and realized “I MADE IT, I HAD ACTUALLY JUST WALKED THE ENTIRE WAY FROM ONE TOWN TO THE OTHER”


Still need work on taking a selfie!!


I stopped to take in the view and take in the reality that I had just walked uphill and I didn’t call a cab or take a bus, I WALKED.  I was overwhelmed with emotions, after a few seconds I heard footsteps.  Two girls stopped behind me, were giggling together and trying to take a selfie.  I offered to take a picture for them and they returned the favor.  At least I got a better picture of the background…ha-ha.


I tried to take a picture of the sign that announced ARCADE but just a portion came out.


I’m telling you, walking with my backpack and with walking sticks was so new to me, I just couldn’t function like normal people.  I didn’t want to stop and take the time to take a decent picture because I felt that all eyes were on me and how clumsy I was.  I didn’t want to give anyone enough time to think, “look at that ridiculous woman, trying to take a picture” I know there was no one looking at me, but my mind kept messing with me.  I walked up to a hotel that had a café, I walked in tired, hungry and thirsty.  Several pilgrims were there already.  I went to the bar and ordered my café con leche and a ham and cheese sandwich.  When the waitress brought me my café I asked about al albergue or pension nearby, she told me there was one next door but it was closed and would open in a couple of hours.  I sat in a corner by the window, again I felt all eyes on me because I was alone.  I sat there and took out my journal and focused on what I had just accomplished and the emotions it brought.  I got my sandwich, boy talk about being hungry, it was delicious.  When I was done eating I went next door to ask about a room at the hotel, I was told it was full already so I went back to the little corner where my things were.  I ordered another café con leche and decided to go outside and drink it there. 


A young woman asked if she could sit with me and of course I said yes.  She was so petite and her backpack was HUGE, we introduced ourselves, her name was Yvonne and she was from Germany.  She had been backpacking for a couple of months already but her and her boyfriend decided to meet further along the Camino since he walked a lot faster than her.  She had a wooden walking stick, she had stuff wrapped around it that she said some lady had taken her in somewhere and had given her.  I thought, how cool is that, I got grapes, hehe.  Safe to say that we receive what we need at the right moment.  We talked for a little while and we had some similar ways of thinking.  I think God places the right people at the right times in your life.  I spoke of what I had experienced in the past couple of days, how I felt unworthy of being there because I couldn’t even walk the entire way.  I tried to hold back my tears but was unsuccessful.  We talked about why we were doing the Camino, what were our reasons and I told her I was trying to find clarity of what my purpose in life was, in what was next for me now that my children were grown.  Not sure how the topic of “loving oneself” came up but we both agreed that to receive love, we had to “love ourselves first”.  Boy this was a big one for me, I have been working on LOVING MYSELF for a long time.

If you have followed this journey you may have noticed that I did not really have much self-love to begin with.  I have been to a lot of spiritual retreats and I thought I had peeled away all the self-doubt, the pain of being told my worth instead of me KNOWING my worth.  I stayed in a marriage way too long that it broke my spirit and here is this woman that I have never met in my life talking to me about LOVING MYSELF FIRST!!!  Before she got there, I had written some words and I looked at my phone and came across the following:

Every woman who heals herself, 
Heals all the women before her and
Heals all the women
Who come after her!!!


I read it to Yvonne and we both got teary eyed.  When we are open to receive messages they sure show up.  They show up in a way that you WILL know that message is from God.  It is HIM wanting you to know that He is there, He’s watching, He’s listening.

Yvonne finished eating and got ready to leave, she told me she had a little song that she did when her body and legs wanted to give out on her and she didn’t care who was watching she sang it to me…” Every little cell on my body is happy, every little cell on my body is well, I’m so glad every little cell in my body is happy and well.”  She sang this while tapping her body and her legs up and down.  It was cute and she wrote it down in my journal.  We didn’t exchange numbers but we exchanged messages, I wrote something on her journal too.  She read it and thanked me for the beautiful message I had written (which I don’t remember what I wrote, haha), we hugged each other and she went on her way.

Oh, my feet are tired,
Oh, my legs are tired,
My soul questioning Why?
My mind shouting to Stop and
Take the easy way out!
My heart yelling out…No, YOU GOT THIS!!!


I spoke with my daughter and her words echoed what my heart was yelling out to me…” Mommy, you got this, My Momma never quits.”  I realized at that moment how my children see me, they see me as this strong woman who can do anything.  A woman that no matter what life throws at her, she will dust herself off and keep going.  But their Mommy puts up a lot of fronts, I may be strong but sometimes I get tired of being strong.  I have had projects and ideas in my head but I’ve failed at many things.  This is not the time to fail, I need to go on as far as I can.


I set an intention for the following day:

I would not listen to any negative talk,
I would put one foot in front of the other,
I would avoid glancing at how much further I had to walk,
I would just,
Keep walking, walking, walking!!

Well I was finally able to check-in to the albergue, it was nice and clean but boy was it an experience…


To be continued…

Redondela – Arcade

As you might have read already, I haven’t done a lot of sightseeing in the towns I have been in.  When I did my research there were so many places I wanted to see while in the towns, but I just didn’t have the energy to do that, it was either save my energy for walking or sightseeing.   Had a good nights rest, the ladies I was with the previous day got up super early and took off, I finally got up and started getting ready.  As I walked back and forth getting ready I saw the gentleman that bunked with us sitting very calmly at the kitchen table, he had some food with him so he was in no rush.  I thought to myself, well that’s an idea.  I have to get some food in me and coffee if I am to continue my walk.

I wasn’t a 5 or 6am starter, more like 8ish. I finally walked downstairs and started my day walking, as soon as I took a right, guess what I found?  Streets going UPHILL, and so it began! I walked to the outskirts of the town, few pilgrims were walking along, of course they all just went past me but that was ok, it wasn’t a competition.  As I came by some homes, I saw a teenager get off a car with a backpack, it was Monday so for the locals it was life as usual, just these weird folks walking through our town.   I had to smile because what I saw was a typical kid, as soon as the Mom took off, he turned around and started walking on the other direction, away from the school.  I had to take a picture and send it to my son, telling him “remind you of someone?” “So this is what you did when I dropped you off in high school?”  It’s not right that they do that, but I smiled because I realized that even in Spain sometimes kids will be kids.  I continued walking through the neighborhood, it seemed easier without the uphill battle. 


Finally, I left the town behind and I was determined to keep going no matter what this time, boy or boy.  I came to a point where I would begin walking on a dirt road, green trees surrounded me, going into this pathway reminded me of Alice in Wonderland, that’s how it felt walking towards this path.


After the 2nd day of walking I had decided not to look at my phone to see how much longer I had to walk, I believed that focusing on how much more I had to go didn’t help my Camino, on the contrary, I think it hurt me and that’s what made me stop walking.  I walked, went up the hill, walked, up the hill, I would find a rock and I had to sit for a few minutes until my heart  down in my chest.  The hills were steeper and steeper, I started crying because I felt I was carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders, my legs felt heavy, my knee was buckling and in pain, but I kept going.  By the way, I had planned music to listen too while on my Camino but I was so focused on the pain and everything I was feeling that I had completely forgot about listening to it, but on one of those hills, at a moment I thought I just couldn’t go on, I stopped and looked at my songs.  The song I played would be perfect for that precise moment, it’s called “I’ll keep on”, I’m adding a link in case someone wants to listen to it.  Every ounce of my being was tired, the words of the song hit home, I am so used to doing things on my own, and not asking for anything for myself, “it’s like I’m standing in the rain and you offered me a raincoat, but I would rather stand in the rain than take the handout”, of yes, that’s me.

Throughout my life I’ve learned the hard way that it’s only a few people I can trust, I’ve been betrayed so much that I’m so cautious now who I trust with my things and my heart.  I’ve been put down so much, kicked when I was already down, and I shed tears, oh, did I she tears for trusting others.  For expecting others to do for me what I did for them, to receive love exactly the way I gave love.

So being there, alone, I was understanding that my soul was indeed tired but I had to keep going.  Listening to the song on repeat, as I was walking up a steep part of the hill, tears rolled down my face, my mind began to go to my past, to the words that I carried in my heart that had hurt me for so many years and I thought I had already shed them from my soul.  “You are so fat, look at you, who the hell is going to want you looking like that”, “look at her, she looks like Shamu!”  Yes, those words have been on rewind in my head for years.  That day, on that hill, huffing and puffing, but still walking up, I heard something new, “Look at me fool, I may be fat, old and out of shape, but I’m in Spain and walking up these beautiful mountains, surrounded by beautiful trees, under the warmth of the sun, look at me now!!”  I felt empowered by those words in my head!

After several uphill battles, I came to one of the places I had seen during my research, the wall of Camino shells, again I cried, after looking at pictures of these areas, I was there, physically in front of this monument.  I sat close by and just took in the view, I took my pictures and took out a business card to leave on a pile of rocks that was right beside the wall, I wrote a few words on the back and carefully placed it between some rocks.  I was grateful for that special moment and yes, I was alone, no one else around.




To be continued…

Day 2 O’Porrino – Redondela

It was so hard for me to get up in the morning, my feet hurt, my legs hurt, my hands hurt, I think it would be safe and faster to say…I hurt from head to toe!!!

I finally got up, very, very slowly.  I went to the RR and there were a few people up already, I didn’t want to walk out by myself, it was still kinda dark, so I sat in my room waiting to hear people leaving.  I walked out of the room again and tried talking to a couple that I saw in the hall way, they didn’t speak English and they brushed me off with their arms.  So I went back to my room and arranged my pack, when it came time to put my shoes on, uhmmm yeah…it hurt!!! I had to suck it up, so took my butt downstairs and to my joy there were a lot more people about to walk out, so I asked a couple of girls if they wouldn’t mind if I walked with them, they kindly said, no problem.  We walked out to a crisp, chilly morning, as we walked along the sidewalk, we began to see so many people coming out of the Municipal Albergue across the street.  It was weird to see all these people heading the same direction.  All with their walking poles and their backpacks weighing on their backs, most of them in 2’s or in a group.  The girls I walked out with didn’t stick around long, they walked so fast I couldn’t keep up, so I was by myself quickly.

After a couple of hours of walking, I was hungry and needed coffee but the café’s were all closed, so just took some sips of water hoping it would calm my hunger.  So there I went, walking in pain and no food or coffee for energy.  I kept thinking I needed to figure out what to do in the mornings, I couldn’t do this every morning without at coffee, my body was going to need fuel.


The sunrise views and the mountains would make up for not having coffee ha, at least for a little while.  Check out the views!!




As I continued to walk UPHILL, not only my feet were in terrible pain but I took one step at a certain point and my knee just buckled.  I was like, really what the heck, am I this screwed up that now my knee is giving me hell?


I made it to MOS and as I sat there with my knee just all whack and of course my toes were just pulsing in pain by now, I looked to see the distance I still had to walk and my mind had already given up, so again, failure, I called a taxi and as he drove me to Redondela, he pointed out the uphill battle I would’ve had to face and sad to accept but there was no way I would’ve made it, I began to think that it probably wasn’t a good idea to go at it myself, there was no one to distract me from my brain telling me to quit.  He took me to a pension (I will update the name later), which unfortunately was not open yet so I had to look around to see where I could sit for a couple of hours.


I came up to a café and ordered a café con leche, they gave me a piece of cake and I ordered a croissant as well.  I was there for quite a while.

After a while a gentleman that entered the café walked by me and started to talk to me.  He asked me where I was originally from since I spoke fluent Spanish, as soon as he heard Mexico, he just started reminiscing about Mexican history, he told me several times how much he loved Mexico and it’s people.  He was a local and I felt blessed to be able to communicate well with the locals.  He was very sweet and we talked for quite a while.  He finally said good-bye and I went back to the pension.  I sat outside a little longer and finally was able to check in and go drop my backpack, rest for a while and take a shower.


Soon, other pilgrims began trickling in, I was in a room with 4 bunkbeds so I ended up bunking with 2 other ladies and a gentleman, which was weird haha, but he was a nice man, poor thing he opened the balcony doors and banged his head really bad, it cut his forehead so as good Samaritans one of the lady’s quickly took out the first aid kid.  A couple of us took a nap and I would finally go out in a group to have something to eat.  It’s funny we ended up at the place I had just had coffee, the company felt good but just weird, of course we all talked about our journey so far and when it came my turn I couldn’t hold back my tears as I was honest and told them I had to take a taxi, I felt so ashamed but if I lied I would only be lying to myself right?  They were very supportive, so I truly appreciated that.  They made me feel a little better and then we just sat there for what seemed for a long time.  They were drinking beer, one of them smoked like a chimney but she was fun to listen too.  One was from Germany, one from Scotland, one From Finland.  After them having a couple of beers, the gentleman that was our roommate came over and we decided to go look for a place to have dinner.  On our way to a restaurant we walked by a pharmacy and they patiently waited for me to go and get some stuff for my toes.


We finally came to what looked like a plaza and decided to sit outdoors, it was across from the park so there were people coming and going.  So what did I get, MILANEZA haha, it was the safest plate, being picky sucks, but it was good. I enjoyed the company and we all walked back to the pension to get some rest. I was so tired that now I realize that I missed out on seeing so much, but I couldn’t even fathom walking to go see anything if I had to get up in the morning to walk some more.

My Camino was not turning out like I planned, I know it was only my 2nd day of walking, but I was already feeling the loneliness, the walk by myself wasn’t too bad, maybe if I was with someone it would have been easier to keep going, I saw people walking and talking, so talking with someone could have been a distraction from the pain and the tiredness.  The hardest part was getting to a town and just being there, alone, my mind was winning, and my ego was just beating me up inside.  I had already called a taxi twice, I looked at my toes and had no clue what the heck was going on with them, they looked purple and swollen and HURT like hell.  Of course, the questions bombarded my head, what the heck were you thinking, how did you possibly think you could do this?  My brain was screaming loud, YOU ARE A FAILURE, YOU KNOW YOU NEVER FINISH ANYTHING.  Everyone back home is going to laugh at you and throw in your face the, “I TOLD YOU SO”.  How was I going to ever live this one down?  The hills are kicking your butt, face it, just go home, you don’t belong here!!

It didn’t help that I was eating only like once a day, that is not enough fuel to keep the pace up.  My body ached so bad, I felt so tired, I knew it wasn’t going to be easy, but never imagined it would be this hard, I know for others this is nothing but a walk in the park, but for me it was the hardest thing I had ever done.  But, tomorrow was another day and I would try again!

Thank you to all that are following this crazy adventure…lots more to come!!


Will questions be answered?


I posted these questions back in August 2016, before I left on my Camino.  I read them and I thought that they would never be answered.  Follow me to find out the answers because 7 months after returning, YES, I finally have the answers!!!

  • What is my intention for this trip?
    • My intention was to face my personal giants which the biggest ones were FEAR and doing things ALONE among others, which I will describe in more detail as I update my blog.
  • Will I find clarity?
  • Will I FEEL anything?
    • Would I feel anything, so far, my feelings are those of inadequacies, failure, loneliness, so out of shape. Any and all negative feelings you can think of.
    • I also felt overwhelmed by the beauty in front of me as I walked. These were bittersweet moments because I forgot to enjoy more of these feelings.
    • More of what I felt to come! Stay tuned!
  • Will I find peace?
  • Will I find myself?
  • Will I finally find the real Cecy?
  • What I really am all about?
  • Will I leave my past there?
  • Will my heart finally be WHOLE again?
  • So many questions in my head swirling and I just feel I am going in circles.
  • When people ask me who I really am, to be honest, I don’t really know.
  • What’s my passion? I am not sure, when I think about it, several things come to mind


Taxi picked me up and took me into O’Porrino, he tried, bless his heart, to calm me down by telling me it was all going to be okay.  He took me to my first “pension” it was a private one, he helped me with my backpack, I paid him and he took off.  At the Pension I encountered more compassion, I was still crying, just felt horrible and such a failure.  She told me that she would give me a room all to myself so that I could just relax and not worry about anyone seeing me so emotional.  The room had 6 beds and no one else came into that room.  She was getting ready to leave for the night so she gave me a simple map of where to go have some dinner after washing up.  I went into the room and just sat there, crying and wrote some words on my journal.  My toes were hurting so bad, I didn’t know why, so I took off my shoes and my socks and looked at my toes…uhmm they did not look NORMAL, my toenails were swollen around the cuticle area, wasn’t sure what was going on, I figured I was just tired of all that walking.  I hit the showers, which were like the showers at the gym, all you had to do was push the nob to get the water going…uhmmm yeah, the water was HOT and there was no turning left or right to make it just warm.  I kept pushing it and it was just super hot, I went to the other showers and they were all the same, hot water.  That’s the quickest shower I’ve ever taken with HOT WATER.  After I was done and out of the showers I noticed the sign (please let the water run a few times to get warm water, water will be HOT) Yupp, a little too late haha!!  Got dressed and I put my flip flops on and I decided to go venture out, I was hungry.  I came up to what looked like a plaza, people everywhere, kids just having fun.  I went up to a place and found a table to sit down…I wasn’t sure what to order and I came across (MILANEZA) well at least it was a safe plate, hehe, I got my milaneza with French fries and I sat there and ate, yes, alone.


I looked around and the thing that caught my attention was that everyone around me was looking UP!  People were actually TALKING to each other, laughing, connecting, made me miss my youth, the time when we didn’t have any cell phones, when you actually made eye contact with people, the time when you didn’t come home until right before dark because you were so busy playing or hanging out outside with no interference by technology.

I paid for my meal and left a tip, the waitress ran after me because I left her TOO much. Go figure, too much tip, that’s a first for me.  I smiled and said no, it’s okay, have an amazing evening.  She looked at me like I was crazy, it took me a couple of times of pushing her hand away with the bill to convince her it was ok.

I went back to the Pension, went up to my room and decided to wash my clothes and hang them outside, it was a cool night so I doubted that they would be completely dry by the morning.  I sat in the small dinning area they had and wrote a few lines in my journal. There were a few people around and I tried to talk to a couple of them but they would pretty much say hi and turn away.  I am normally not that hard to start-up a conversation so I wasn’t sure what was happening.  Was I trying too hard? Did I look intimidating, like my son always tells me?  I doubted it, because I felt  so lost that the last thing I would do is intimidate someone.  I stayed there for a while and I finally just decided to go to bed.  My toes were killing me, but again, I just thought I was tired and thought that they would feel better in the morning.  Boy was I wrong!!!

I will spare you from seeing my poor toes!!! haha

Day 2 coming up next!!



After walking through the town I was finally able to see more of the amazing views I would be enjoying on this trip, blue skies and grapes everywhere.


During my research some people said you didn’t need much training, others would say…train, train train!!! Well on my first day I would learn that I SHOULD HAVE DONE MORE TRAINING ha ha…


As I entered the dirt roads and what seemed like endless trees, I was feeling really good, taking pictures and still in shock that I was actually there, walking like so many others have done before me.  I didn’t feel weird on my own, I didn’t feel unsafe.  I noticed so many white little butterflies all around me, I felt they were my company along the way. At times it seemed like I was in a fairy tale forest with the trees covered in moss, I felt like all of a sudden I would see fairies flying by.  All was good until I came to my first part of walking UP, oh boy, as soon as my heart rate raced up, the first things out of my mouth were, “WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING HERE?” “WHAT WAS I THINKING?”  Yeah, it was a little too late to turn back now right! But I remembered what others said too, it’s YOUR CAMINO, YOUR PACE! So guess what I did, I stopped, caught my breath and kept going.

Remember, I had NEVER done anything like this, did I mention NEVER!!!!

After walking for a few hours, I couldn’t and didn’t have the desire to even take pictures.  I was questioning everything, why in the world would I even think that I could do this.  I know I wrote the WHY but, all I could think at that moment was, I just couldn’t do it, I wanted to quit and it had only just begun.

I finally came up to a café, it was around noon. I saw some pilgrims sitting outside and I smiled as I walked by and went in to order something.  I had no idea what to get, I just felt so lost.  So, I ordered a coke and a ham and cheese sub.  When I got it I just stared at it for a little while, that thing was HUGE, I was like, I can’t finish this!  I tried to go sit outside to see if I would strike a conversation with any of  the groups outside, as I stood there looking for a seat I just saw everyone in their own world, laughing and talking amongst them, no  one even looked up.  I went back inside and sat by myself. I took a bite of my sub, it was really good and I was so hungry, the coke tasted different, but I drank it anyway! Lol

I felt the locals were just staring at me, not in a bad way, just like feeling sorry for me because I was alone.  After walking those few hours, I still felt clumsy with the poles and my pack.  I walked to the bathroom crashing into everything, I splashed some water on my face to freshen up before I continued on. I walked outside to get going and saw that almost everyone that had been sitting outside was gone.   So I followed the ones that were just passing through, boy was I in trouble again, the next part was going UP!!! Yupp, here we go again. I was stopping almost every 5 minutes, it was crazy. I finally began walking in a straight line again but after walking since 8 in the morning and seeing that it was already like 4pm, I looked at my phone to see how much longer I had to walk to get to O’Porrino. When I saw that it said like another hour, I was like “oh, hell no.” I found a huge rock by the road and I sat down, with pack and all.  At that moment I felt so alone, and I was done, my body could not move, I mean literally. I felt the heaviness of my pack, I felt my legs were glued to the ground and tears starting flowing.  Who to call, who to reach out to at that moment. That’s when I posted a message on the Camigas page, asking for help, like the Camigas would be able to just fly over and pick me up.  What were they gonna do?  I had no idea that even though they would not be able to pick me up, the support and encouraging words that I received with that post was just AMAZING and some would now be checking in on me throughout my journey.

I couldn’t post any of this on my page because all I could think of was family commenting, “I TOLD YOU, YOU COULDN’T DO IT,” which would just add to that small voice in my head screaming at me “see, you are a quitter” “how embarrassing that it’s only your first day and you are already calling a taxi.” My body and my feet hurt, but my heart hurt even more because I felt like a total failure.  Most of us say that we are our worst enemy, well that includes me for sure, I AM MY WORST CRITIC AS WELL. My head was screaming to get my ass up and keep going, my body shut down completely and told me, YOU AIN’T GOING ANYWHERE!!

I needed a taxi, so I searched and just called, I didn’t care about roaming, about what my bill would look like, I just could not take ONE MORE STEP.  I heard a voice on the other end, and of course what was the first thing he asked me, “WHERE ARE YOU?”  I lost it, I started bawling!!  I had NO IDEA where I was, how was he supposed to come get me if I couldn’t even tell him where I was.  He asked if there were any signs, any houses around. I said, well yeah, there are houses, sitting right outside one. The next words out of his mouth would be like telling me to go steal something! He said, “well, go knock on the door”,  he had no idea what and who he had just asked to go do that! YOU WANT ME TO DO WHAT AGAIN!!!  MEEE, GO KNOCK ON SOMEONE’S DOOR, ARE YOU NUTS?

You see, I can ask for help for ANYONE and EVERYONE EXCEPT for myself.  Facing my giants had begun, the first lesson of my Camino had just presented itself.

The Camino Provides!!


I had no choice, how else was I going to get this taxi driver to come get me.  So I drop my pack and walk over to the gate, here it goes. I rang the doorbell, it didn’t take long for a lady to open and all I could say was, “can you please tell the taxi driver where I am”, of course my voice is cracking, tears are just rolling down my face.  Her facial expression changed instantly to one of worry, she told me “oh my, no, no, don’t cry, you’re ok” she got on the phone and told the driver where I was.  She asked if I was alone and I turned to look at my pack and I said yes, she walked over and picked up my pack and my poles and invited me into her front yard.  At a patio table, there was another older lady sitting there and offered me the other chair, the one that opened the door asked me if I wanted some grapes, and I said yes, I would love some, so she went and brought me a handful of grapes and even some fresh pears.  As I sat there waiting I thought, well I think I just encountered my first Camino Angels.  Both of them were so sweet to me, they asked me questions and told me I was brave for even attempting this by myself, they didn’t realize that I was so ready to quit and it was just my first day!  The Angels opened their doors to a total stranger, the tenderness I felt was indescribable, they were really concerned about the shape I was in.  The taxi didn’t take very long and he too was worried, I wondered what would happen in our world, at home, would we open our doors to a stranger?  Would we offer the same kindness and tenderness and comfort to someone we don’t know? What do you think?

Thanks for reading…of course stay tuned!


Walking into Spain!

I know it has been a while but I’m back to continue to re-live my journey through Spain.

I went through that scary tunnel, but it was a short walk through there, you come out the other side and walk up to the border between Portugal and Spain.  I had been looking at pictures of the bridge which were breathtaking and now, on that day, I was there, right in front of that same bridge about to cross into Spain. I thought i was still dreaming.  My selfies are still not perfect but here are some pictures of this amazing bridge and its surrounding waters. The views of part of the Rio Mouro were just beautiful.  I stood there for a few minutes, just taking it all in.  I was in no hurry.

When you go through life rushing or so busy trying to raise a family, working on healing broken hearts, forgiving others for the wrong done to you or forgiving yourself for any wrong done to others, you miss out on the beauty of life, the small things go past you without notice.  You always hear those famous words, “stop and smell the roses” but when you are so used to just existing, those words go in one ear and out the other.

But at that moment, nothing else mattered; I stopped to admire the view, standing still, if only for a few minutes. I lost myself in thought, finding peace with the sight of the blue waters that seemed to go on and on!


I finally crossed the bridge, slowly, crossed paths with a couple of pilgrims and said my first “Buen Camino.”  Once across the bridge, I was in Spain, the first thing I come to is a sign reminding me what I was doing there “CAMINO DE SANTIAGO.”  I had to make sure I was looking for the little yellow arrows so I wouldn’t get lost.  As I was about to turn a corner, there was a gas station and I was thirsty so I stopped to get some bottled water.  I still felt so clumsy with my pack and my walking poles, thank God my arm/shoulder were not hurting and I can maneuver enough to slide my pack back into place.

I came up to this castle looking building which is actually a cathedral. Santa Maria de la Asuncion, here is a little bit of history of this Romanesque and Gothic-style Catholic church.

tui catedral

This Roman Catholic church is in the Tui region of Galicia, Spain. It is located at Plaza de San Fernando in the center of the town.


Construction began in the 12th century and the North portal and layout derive from this age. The main facade (1225) however is of a later Gothic style. The main chapel located in the choir was completed in 1699 by Castro Canseco. The interior has a large prominent retablo de la Expectacion, and a large altar of relics in the Chapel of the Relics. The cloister is in Gothic style.


  1. Jump up ^ Diocese of Tui-Vigo, entry on church.



And here is where I had my first and ONLY weird/creepy encounter haha.  As I admired the cathedral I wanted to take a “selfie”, but as you might have noticed, still a work in progress in that department!! So this man approached me and asked if I wanted him to take a picture for me and I said yes, well he kinda got too close and was rearranging my hair and I’m like, uhmmm you are way too close to me!!!! But i said, whatever, just take the picture so I can go on my way and of course I am not too fond of taking picture of myself, but the end result was not so bad, at the end of the day, this is who I am and it didn’t matter anymore what my appearance was.  I was walking in Spain and nothing else mattered.


I stopped in the Camino office and then I went on my way.  As I walked within the town and walking on stone streets all I could think of is, wow, I felt I was walking into Roman times, I felt like at the end of the street I would come up to see Jesus. The feeling of walking though here is like nothing I have felt before.  Now I wish I’ve taken more time to see more of the town, to have seen inside the grounds of the cathedral.  All this just means that I will have to go back, right?

If you like what you are reading, I ask that you hit like on my blog page.  Thank you for reading!!! see you back here soon…